A LITTLE OF MY STORY
The gibbous moon hung charmingly in the midnight sky, casting a soft glow through the tiny window of our flight to Amsterdam. My husband and I were en route to Bangalore, with a whirlwind of plans awaiting us in India: work meetings in Bangalore, a family vacation in Kerala, reconnecting with friends in Bhubaneswar, attending a family wedding in Behrampur, and spending a few days in an Ayurveda retreat in Kerala. It was a trip packed to the brim with activities, with little time to catch our breath.
Traveling to India always brings a sense of excitement mixed with a dose of uncertainty. On the flight, I started reading Same as Ever: A Guide to What Never Changes by Morgan Housel, a book my husband had packed for the journey. Its simple truths struck a chord with me, especially as I reflected on my own experiences, including a recent trip to India for my book launch. That event had been a lesson in itself – full of excitement, but also a reminder that reality often falls far short of our expectations.
The memories from my book release, though fresh and meaningful, had left me with a bittersweet aftertaste. This time, I decided to approach our upcoming trip with a different mindset: I reset my expectations to nearly zero.
The Reality of Expectations
As we all know, expectations can be a tricky thing. The more we attach ourselves to them, the more we set ourselves up for disappointment. But life, as the scriptures often remind me, is like water. We’re meant to flow naturally, adapting to whatever comes our way. I realized that much of my frustration and joy wasn’t determined by what others did, but by the expectations I placed on them. For this trip, I resolved to let go. To simply accept life as it unfolds, embracing spontaneity over planning, and gratitude over expectation.
Of course, this isn’t easy. As humans, we are wired to attach meaning and desire to outcomes. It takes conscious introspection and self-reflection to detach ourselves from expectations. However, with time and practice, I’ve come to realize that personal growth occurs through these experiences. It’s a slow transformation, but it’s profound. The more I let go of control, the more freedom I find within myself to truly enjoy life.
The Joy of Unplanned Moments
With that attitude, I entered this trip with open arms. Beyond the essential travel logistics, I refrained from setting rigid plans. This shift in mindset created space for life’s little joys to sneak in, unexpected moments that brought delight in ways I hadn’t imagined.
Sipping tea from a roadside vendor, catching up with friends at cozy eateries, wandering through lush landscapes, or strolling through crowded city streets – all these experiences felt more vibrant and full because I wasn’t waiting for something specific to happen. I was simply enjoying whatever came.
From attending a traditional family wedding to meeting accomplished professionals, temple visits to indulging in meals served on banana leaves, shopping in upscale malls to browsing through quaint ethnic stores, each experience held its charm. By resetting my expectations, I embraced the spontaneity of the journey, allowing the path to unfold naturally as I traveled.
A Shift in Perspective
One thing travel always does is turn our mirrors into windows. We stop reflecting on our limited personal perspectives and start absorbing the vastness of the world around us. It humbles us, broadens our horizons, and deepens our knowledge in ways that only experience can teach.
With every journey, I find myself growing. And this trip, with its lack of expectations, was a reminder that the most enriching experiences often come from the moments we don’t plan. Life, when we allow it to flow freely, offers us treasures far greater than what we can imagine.
Takeaway: The Beauty of Letting Go
Resetting my expectations to zero didn’t mean expecting anything. It meant embracing everything as it came. This mindset shift freed me from disappointment and opened me to the beauty of the unexpected. And isn’t that what life is all about? The ability to let go and find joy in the journey itself.
P.S. Since that journey, life has led me to many unplanned travels, both near and far. And through each one, this gentle wisdom has stayed with me: to show up, soak it all in, and stop expecting too much from myself. It’s a liberating way to travel and to live in the moment.
Thank you for reading! Feel free to like, share, and explore more of my posts. Stay tuned!
Subrat
08/07/2025Beautifully articulated — a heartfelt reflection on the true essence of life’s journey. Truly enjoyed it.
Manorama Choudhury
08/08/2025Thank you so much!
J Choudhury
08/07/2025Beautiful and lucid description with words that draw a picture. That sets you apart as a poet. And a philosopher too, with the inward look that encapsulates Gita in its true essence.
Manorama Choudhury
08/08/2025Thank you for your kind and generous appreciation!
Tapan Mohanty
08/07/2025Our scriptures reiterate the philosophy of non expectations from life but our deeds throw back the results spontaneously as Ocean throws. Ur depictions in India tour is interesting always n needless to say it adds to ur experience n so also others knowledge n pleasure. Keep writing ur heartfelt sweet n sour feelings.
Manorama Choudhury
08/08/2025Much appreciated.
Rabindra Kumar Das
08/07/2025Undertaking a travel, not tightly scheduled, keeps our mind free of worries and any prior preparation, while making our body ever eager to move without rest to taste the beauty of uncharted lands, may it be the unending sea beaches or the densely forested highlands. And there we corelate the mystery of life with that of nature. Beautiful write up by MANORAMA in her lucid style offering scintilating read.
Manorama Choudhury
08/08/2025I am so happy that it touched you. Regards!
Chandra Misra
08/07/2025Very nice write up. Enjoyed reading it. We are all very proud of you.
Manorama Choudhury
08/08/2025Thank you, Chandra nani, for enjoying it!
Josna Mishra
08/07/2025Such a wonderful write-up!! Thank you for sharing your experiences surrounding expectations before, during, and after your well planned trip and visit. These contribute to teachable moments for me and so many. Resetting the expectations (lower or none) that is difficult without practice certainly gives us a very new perspective about life in general and career, family, specialized plans/activities, and relationships in specific. It is a blessing to be aware of it to begin with.
Manorama Choudhury
08/08/2025Dear Josna Nani,
Thank you for your in-depth reflection on my blog. Indeed, this applies to all fields of life, including the expectations we have of ourselves. All emotional turmoil – grief, anger, and disappointment – stems from attachment, and expectations are directly rooted in that same attachment. It’s not easy to practice, but as you said, awareness of this very fact can certainly help us on the path. Regards to you!